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When I’m President 11-24-2021

I don’t plan on running for president anytime soon.  However, if I did, and was elected, things would be a whole lot different around here.  This post is not meant to get into anything political AT ALL, rather, it’s a way for me to blow off a little steam regarding a bunch of things people say WAY TOO MUCH that drive me crazy.  As there are approximately eight gazillion things that bother me, I will share a partial list, say, every Thursday.

So, without further ado, here is my list of catch words, sayings, and phrases that will be OUTLAWED or simply GONE, should I ever become president.  A word of caution, you most likely use one or many of these………

Put in my two cents

If you don’t care about the situation to where you can’t put in more than two lousy pennies, I don’t care one bit about your opinion!  Get out of here!

Food for thought

My thoughts consist of slowly murdering people who overuse these sayings.  They do not need nourishment.

Playing devil’s advocate

Did the devil give you this position?  Was there an opening because I never saw it advertised on Indeed?  Did the former advocate retire?  I’m guessing that hell is not experiencing the same shortage of workers, seeing as a lot of people seemingly play the role.     

Wear many hats

Someone who performs a lot of roles is said to, wear many hats.  This is even said where I work, where wearing a hat is against the organization’s dress code.

Eggs in one basket

We are warned not to do this, but I’m wondering why I would want to utilize multiple baskets for my eggs.  I’m less apt to leave some of them behind if I put them all in one basket.

Two beers short of a six pack

Stupid saying by stupid people who are complaining about someone being stupid.

Hot off the press

This is utilized when something is breaking in the news industry.  It should NOT be utilized to gossip about Aunt Maude’s new beau. 

Author: Whipped Owl

Writer Musician Historian Sportsman Loner

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