I had a dream about my very first love recently. I’m not sure what triggered it but it came out of nowhere and hit me surprisingly hard. The details were so vividly clear that they had me wondering if I ever really got over her.
She left me 28 years ago. Although it was a brutal breakup at the time, so much life has taken place since that I really haven’t given her much thought at all. I’ve loved, lost, loved again, triumphed, and everything in between. So how come in this dream could I recall her smell and taste her lips when we kissed? Why was I ecstatic to be holding her once again? How did 1991 come back so easily?
When I woke up, she was gone. It was a crushing realization, like she was saying goodbye all over again. I got out of bed and moped around for a while. I played our old wedding song. I recalled memories I hadn’t thought about in decades. I wished her back into my arms. For the first time ever, I tried finding her online. What if I found her? Would it even matter?
Does this happen to everyone? Or am I simply going crazy? Is it a mere blip that will eventually go away? And has this ever happened to her? Is she waking up from a dream right now and thinking about me?
Where the hell did this come from?